What TRISLIDE does for endurance sports-related chafing is what a hungry teenage boy does to a bag of Nacho Cheese Doritos. TRISLIDE makes chafing disappear!
TRISLIDE is a continuous spray anti-chafe skin lubricant that is all the rage in the multi-sport community. This stuff seriously is bottled awesomeness. This non-sticky all-day lubricant is used anywhere you might have chafing…wetsuit neck openings, saddle area, feet. Basically – you spray and forget! TRISLIDE isn’t like that gooey stick stuff that other competitors offer; it’s a spray-on silicone that works wonders! Ever have a hard time getting out of a wetsuit? Spray TRISLIDE on the outside of the cuffs and ankle openings, and you will literally fly right out of your suit! You can share this (without fear of contracting some pesky critters or having someone else’s extra “hairs” latch on to your body). TRISLIDE won’t stain your Tri-Kit, and it won’t melt in your transition bag either.
I’m not going to lie – TRISLIDE is SERIOUSLY slippery! The product comes with a warning to not spray Tri-Slide on the floor as it will make the floor extremely slick and could lead to falls.
So, with this knowledge, here are the top five things that you COULD use TRISLIDE for – but you really SHOULDN’T use TRISLIDE for…
# 5: Rusty bolt un-stopper
Yes, you could use TRISLIDE to loosen up those rusty bolts – and this stuff would probably work as good, if not better, than your trusty can of WD-40 or a massive amount of elbow grease.
# 4: Personal….ahem….lubricant
Now, we all love some lovin’, but please…..don’t go there with TRISLIDE. It’s for external use only.
# 3: Saucer Sled Accelerant
We’ve all watched the movie “Christmas Vacation” and seen what Clark Griswold can do to a saucer sled with his cereal varnish. TRISLIDE would make Griswold’s varnish look like glue. Beware if you do try TRISLIDE as an accelerator for your sled. If you use too much at one time, land speed records could be broken.
# 2: Hair Pomade
Every triathlete wants to look great when they leave transition, and who doesn’t like the “slick” look in their hair? But seriously…instead of TRISLIDE, go to the drugstore and purchase some Dippity-Do or some other hair gel. Heck, even Vaseline would look good. Just don’t use TRISLIDE….because if you do, instead of your girlfriend slowly running her fingers through your hair, her hands are likely to slip right off and hit you in the eyes. And no one wants to get poked in the eye.
# 1: Flamethrower
Who hasn’t wanted to light some aerosol aflame and use as a firestarter? Why not try your hand at a little welding? Meet a pesky dog on your run? OK. There MIGHT be some potential good uses if you could use TRISLIDE as a flamethrower. But, don’t do it. Use a can of Aqua-Net Hairspray instead. Besides, I’m not even sure if you can set TRISLIDE on fire.
OK. It’s settled then. Don’t use TRISLIDE for any of those five things. Do use TRISLIDE to prevent chafing and hot spots. Do use TRISLIDE to help get out of wetsuits in a jiffy. Do share your TRISLIDE with others and not worry about some space-suit wearing dude from the Centers for Disease Control showing up to escort your lube away to some quarantined location.