My Diagnosis: Dunlop Disease

I have six-pack abs.

No really.  I do.  (Please quit laughing now).  It’s just that my six-pack abs are well insulated within a small cooler.  One might even say that instead of six-pack abs, I’ve been blessed with a 12-pack.  Or maybe a small keg.

I used to really have a six-pack.  Of course, I was in high school and running 40 miles a week.  And I weighed 130 lbs.

Fast forward 25 years, and 50 lbs, and one can understand how my six pack dissolved (or maybe grew) to the size of a small child.

Yes…it’s official.  I have the dreaded Dunlop Disease.  As in….my gut done lopped over my belt.  Others may call it the Muffin Maladie. 

Luckily, this disorder is not, in and of itself, fatal.  There’s a cure, but for some, the medicine can be bitter.

The cure?  Core work.  Lots of it.

Here’s the deal.  I HATE doing core work.  Probably because my core is weak and any amount of core work become a shaky, painful, out-of-breath experience for me.  But, alas, I’ve made a committment to myself that it’s time to focus on my core.

I’ve decided to incorporate a couple of different key workouts for my core.  Both came from Mens Health magazine. 

The first one is called “The Best Ab Workout Ever” – and luckily for me, doesn’t involve crunches.  See, I hate crunches.  They hurt.  They burn.  But….I suspect that this won’t be any easier on me.  In fact, it might be more difficult.  I’ll start on Level 1 – because I’m so out of shape – and do this on Mondays and Fridays.

On Wednesdays, I’ll actually do some crunches.  The second workout (which I will do on Wednesdays) is called “The Ultimate Medicine Ball Workout“.  It was originally published in 2008 as a favorite workout of the University of North Carolina basketball team.  You may have heard this workout called the Medicine Ball 200.  And since I love almost all things Carolina, I do actually like this workout.  I’ve done this exercise series more than once, and while painful, the results have been solid.  It’s actually a killer workout, and one that can be scaled up or down depending upon need and fitness level.

This might be a bitter pill for me.  But there’s no denying that I have Dunlop Disease.  It MUST go away before spring. 

The doctor has spoken.

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2 thoughts on “My Diagnosis: Dunlop Disease

  1. I hear ya. I’ve caught some early symptoms, like no longer needing a belt at all for most of my pants that were saggy during my 140.6 training days.
    My belly started to celebrate Christmas early and decorate itself like a bowl full of jelly. My off season has already gone on too long! I’m hitting the pain cave hard and often this week. Hopefully I can get some training momentum back.

  2. Planks and leg lifts in a power yoga class last week made me realize that unlike everyone else in the class, I can barely do a supported plank without falling over. It’s sad. And embarrassing. Good luck with building core strength in the off season! It’s a good goal for all of us!

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